Obscure Cult Classics That Didn’t Stand the Test of Time

Not every film considered a “classic” today was a hit right out of the gate. Sometimes, it takes years for an obscure little movie to find the audience that helps it evolve into something beloved. But they won’t be loved by everybody. I want to make it clear to fans of these popular cult classics that I have nothing but respect for your opinion and think it is beautiful that you have found something to enjoy in these films. However, I also hope you can respect why I would not call any of them favorites of mine.

The Adventures Of Buckaroo Banzai Across The 8th Dimension (1984)

With Multiverse movies all the rage these days, now might be a great time to reboot The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the 8th Dimension. Some may believe a remake would be a sin, but it might make a little more sense than this aggressively — dare I say egregiously — ridiculous sci-fi adventure.

Barbarella (1968)

Two-time Oscar winner Jane Fonda admitted to 60 Minutes that, for many years, she regretted playing the scantily clad title role of Barbarella. Hopefully, Sydney Sweeney does not feel the same when she stars in an upcoming remake of the cheesy, borderline X-rated outer space adventure.

Basket Case (1982)

You could argue that Belial — Duane’s deformed, formerly conjoined twin — is one of the unique horror movie villains of the ’80s, if not ever. You could also argue that the puppet performs best in Basket Case, which still makes writer/director Frank Henenlotter cringe with its “shabbiness,” as he admitted to Westword in 2014.

Billy Jack (1971)

Co-writer, director, and star Tom Laughlin’s follow-up to Born Losers was the most popular movie of 1971, with much credit to its decent fight sequences. Yet, Billy Jack’s toughest critics don’t appreciate a seemingly pro-violence message that its preachy execution and snail’s pace don’t make any easier to swallow.

My Bloody Valentine (1981)

Quentin Tarantino told EW his favorite slasher is this horror film with a romantic twist, which is an odd choice to me. Out of all the classic ’80s slashers, the influential filmmaker picks a acted, nonsensical whodunnit like My Bloody Valentine.

The Boondock Saints (1999)

How the poster for this incomprehensible, purposeless mess of a crime thriller with attempts at humor that were already horribly dated became a must-have for college dorm rooms worldwide is baffling to me. The best thing I can say about the otherwise popular ’90s movie The Boondocks Saints is that it made Norman Reedus a cult icon before joining the Walking Dead cast as Daryl Dixon.

Brain Damage (1988)

Writer and director Frank Henenlotter told Future Movies that the plot of Brain Damage — about a murderous alien parasite that provides a loner (Rick Hearst) with euphoric trips straight to the brain stem — symbolizes his struggles with addiction and coping with a breakup. Honestly, his habit at the time explains why this tasteless creature feature, another Henenlotter film in which the puppet is the best actor, came out the way it did.

Children Of The Corn (1984)

You will not find the aptly “corny” Children of the Corn on our list ranking the best Stephen King movies. Even John Franklin’s performance as the murderous youngsters’ fanatical leader, Isaac — which some might call the saving grace of director Fritz Kiersch’s original adaptation — gets a little irritating after a while.

Chopping Mall (1986)

A prime example of when “so-bad-it’s-good” becomes “so-bad-it’s-just-really-not-very-good” is producer Roger Corman’s Chopping Mall, starring beloved Scream Queen Barbara Crampton. This “teens vs. mall security robots” schlock-fest is an ’80s horror movie that could benefit from a remake that better explores its technophobic themes and is not bogged down by a mindless story, wooden dialogue, and unlikable characters.

Dolemite (1975)

Netflix’s Dolemite is My Name proves how much this Blaxploitation favorite meant to co-writer and star Rudy Ray Moore (portrayed in the biopic by Eddie Murphy). However, it also does not shy away from revealing the inexperience of almost everyone involved with Dolemite, even with enough evidence in the finished product with wooden acting, laughably poor editing, and glaring mistakes like visible boom mics.

Event Horizon (1997)

The concept for Paul W.S. Anderson’s cosmic horror flick — a ship designed to travel through dimensional gateways that accidentally took a trip through Hell — is brilliant. Where Event Horizon misses the mark — and star Sam Neill agrees — is a lack of suspense and nuance in favor of gory shock.

Eraserhead (1977)

Of all of David Lynch’s horror films, his debut feature may be his most definitive work. By that, I mean Eraserhead is his most irritatingly perplexing and mind-numbingly slow effort, even when considering the captivating production design and intriguing metaphor of fatherly insecurities.

Faces Of Death (1978)

One of the surefire signs of a bad movie is showing violence for the sake of violence, which describes Faces of Death. The staged scenes in this collection of various depictions of fatal scenarios are tasteless enough. Still, including pre-existing footage showing the aftermath of natural deaths — according to The Independent — is a step too far.

Hocus Pocus (1993)

It is easy to understand why Hocus Pocus has become an annual Halloween tradition… for children. Why adults continue to ignore some uncomfortable truths about this spooky adventure that is not as funny as it wants to be is more complicated to understand unless they are under the Sanderson Sisters’ spell.

Maniac (1980)

If not for Tom Savini’s consistently brilliant special effects, this mindless, nauseating, suspense-less slasher from co-writer and star Joe Spinell would have nothing going for it. At least Elijah Wood’s 2012 Maniac remake had the unique idea to film everything, literally, through the eyes of the killer.

Masters Of The Universe (1987)

Some beloved fantasy properties do not translate to live-action cinema as well as they do when animated, and Masters of the Universe is a good example. There is no denying Dolph Lundgren is the spitting image of He-Man, and Frank Langella is hamming it up beautifully as Skeletor. Still, the childish, cheesy, and even dull content left may have had something to do with Netflix canceling its reboot.

Pink Flamingos (1972)

The point of writer and director John Waters’ most infamous film is to watch characters — including drag legend Divine as Babs Johnson — outdo each other in filthiness, quickly earning its NC-17 rating in the process. I’ll spare any lucky, unfamiliar souls the dirty details, but I certainly understand Roger Ebert’s hate for Pink Flamingos.

Possession (1981)

Possession is not a demonic possession thriller a la The Exorcist, but that is not my source of disappointment with this surreal tale of an unraveling marriage. Isabelle Adjani and Sam Neill’s solid performances and some genuinely horrible sights cannot save Andrzej Zulawski’s avant-garde supernatural feature from feeling like a meandering student film that puts style over substance.

Repo! The Genetic Opera (2008)

Conceptually (failure to pay for organ replacement is punishable by death) and aesthetically (inventive production design, unique costuming, and nightmarish makeup and gore effects), I might call Repo! The Genetic Opera was a success. As a musical experience (employing actors who aren’t the best singers, including Paris Hilton), it might be the most torturous effort from Darren Lynn Bousman, who has four Saw movies under his belt.

Sleepaway Camp (1983)

The fact that Sleepaway Camp is, in essence, no different from other summer horror movies (especially fellow whodunnit Friday the 13th) is not at all why it has aged poorly. That would reveal the killer’s true identity, which — without giving too much away — is dripping with transphobia.

Species (1995)

The concept of the woman of your dreams turning out to be a nightmare from outer space is pretty unsettling. However, Species seems more concerned with objectifying star Natasha Henstridge…